Poet

April is National Poetry Month in the United States and last April, as I took English class for my first block, we did poetry for a whole month. From reading, interpreting, until writing. It was a lot of fun, I should say. I read a lot of interesting poems in such a broad variety of topic, writing style, diction, imagery, even shape. And here, today, I will post some of my original poem that I made myself. Pardon my English, it's just for fun :)

(P.S : it's a series)

A Human’s Life

A series of poem about things and days

under the roof;

The Brush’s Tale

Ah, here she awake.

I know in a second she will be gone to the bathroom

she’ll rinse her lovely oval face

And unsoiled her small little mouth

she’ll put on her usual piece; denim and tee

and here she comes; she’ll come to grab me.

her marbly soft palm grips me tight

lifts me up to meet those my friends; who

nap and live on her top.

Hello good friends, let me untangled you

With my thin fingers and legs

Let me straighten through your jungle

That would adjoin charm and shine

to the lovely facade of yours

Breakfast Diary

Warm spicy air breathing in the air,waking

up sleepers from their temporary sweet doze

dancing utensils are all ready

those loved ones sit sweet and tight

Can we start eating yet?

Morning Conversation

“darling what’s your plan today”

“daddy I want more cereal”

“would you please hand me the butter?”

“this orange juice is so good!”

“…about last night….,”

“I love you baby.”

“I have to leave.”

“don’t forget your lunch sweety.”

“we need to talk.”

“will you marry me?”

Kiss and slaps, hugs and tears, together and apart

All comes in harmony with the clinks from the dancing utensils

Eulogy at the Door

" I love you"

An universal saying that epitomize every hidden fondness and showed off hatred

because it all roots to one whisper in their prayer : I care.

to be continued

Cheers,

Nadia

Foodies Doodies

Hi guys!

Well it's 00:33 am in the morning but I don't quite feel like sleeping, probably because I literally slept all day today. Yes it's holiday time already! I received my report card and I'm quite satisfied with my score, alhamdulillah :) I'll have days off until 9th of January so I have plenty of time! Don't have any plan yet so feel free to hit me up!

So what I'm going to write on my page today (tonight?) is......food! Lol yeah I'm going to write all-about the food that I miss in America and how I overcome that in my lovely homeland.

It's always been one of the common question in my exchange-student's life; either people in my host community ask about what do I eat in Indonesia or people in Indonesia ask how I eat in America. For the first question mostly I would just say Indonesian eat a lot of rice. My host family happened to love trying new food so yeah I cooked them some Indonesian food. Of course, with adjusted taste and recipe. So in a year, I managed to cook 'em soto ayam, nasi goreng, bihun goreng, gado-gado, tempe mendoan, perkedel jagung, kerupuk udang, kerupuk bawang aaand kerupuk ikan :D

My host family they love to cook and to eat (well we all most do right) but it's true that we have tons of food at home because my host mom likes to stock on stuff...so we never run out of anything. well, rarely :p but yeah the food is quite different from us. My host mom always cooks for dinner, we usually would have whether Italian (pasta of many different kind; ravioli, spaghetti, lasagna, manicotti, farfalle mostly with tomato based sauce or pesto) Mexican (burritos(!!), quesadilla, chili) Asian (noodle with peanut sauce, thai curry, stir-fry, tofu, spring roll, couscous) American (home made burger, grilled cheese, omelettes, grilled chicken, pizza(?)) Indian (curry, lentils with lots and lots of condiments) always accompanied by a yummy bowl of fresh garden salad (we had a chef salad for dinner one day it was daaamn good) with vinegar/ranch/russian/goddess dressing, my mom's famous homemade bread (or sometimes replaced with challah, jewish bread for shabbat night) . And sometimes Jewish food during holiday times like charoset, challah, gilte fish, latkes, matzos, hamantashen, kugel(!!), etc etc. Because my mom cooks a lot, we always have leftover for the next day that my host sisters would usually bring as lunch to school (me sometimes :p) but besides we always have something to eat. like, always :) love you mom :* (reminds me of how often she went grocery shopping)

I've been missing some american food since I came back home! This is a list of food I miss the most (but I manage to fulfill it, thank God I live in Jakarta) :

1. Granola!

For God's sake I miss granola sooo bad! At first I really dislike it; I thought its texture was weird and way way too sweet. But the fact is...I love granola. I haven't found any decent granola anywhere so far but I did find granola bars :') exactly the one I always ate in the US. Nature Valley crunchy granola bar (still looking for the chewy ones!) Got it at Food Hall for about $6 for 6.

2. PB&J sandwich

I was pretty disappointed when I bought Jif peanut butter at Carrefour (it wasn't cheap!) it didn't taste like the one I used to eat. Then I saw the ingredients...that's why. The peanut butter that I love is the one that only has peanut and oil in the ingredients..so yummy. For the jelly, naah just used regular fruit jam, they're just as good :)

3. Salad!

Uh-oh. Salad! I found perfect salad at Food Hall (again!) with a lot of dressing choices (honey mustard until vinaigrette). Tamani has decent caesar salad, too. I miss light vinegar dressing so bad so when I found Hellmann's light vinaigrette dressing I instantly bought it. I ate only apple, cucumber, and lettuce salad for a while. Recipe : take half an apple, cut into cubes. a cup of lettuce (but lately I don't use it again, dislike Indonesian lettuce), shredded. Half a cucumber, cubed. 2 tablespoons of dressing (14 calories!), mix well. then add cheddar cheese, either grated or cubed. mix well. (raisins and/or wonton strips goes well with them too). Refrigerate for 10 mins before serving. Enjoy :)

4. Apple pie!!

I am extremely fond of pies. Apple, pumpkin, pecan, name it. But mostly is apple! Love it love it. I made it once (with help, of course) and it turned so yummy! Apple pie and vanilla ice cream is sooo American. I haven't found any ready-to-use pie crust (I'm sure Jakarta has it somewhere) so I just baked some apples instead! Taste just like the filling. Recipe : take an apple, remove the core then cut into thin slices. Put in a bowl. Pour some cinnamon powder (around a teaspoon) mix well until apple slices well-coated. sprinkle some sugar. place alumunium foil on the pan. preheat oven to 170-ish. put it in for about 15-20 mins. enjoy your warm juicy baked apple!

5. Frozen bananas and grapes.

One of my favorite snack. Just peeled the bananas, cut into two. put into freezer. grapes; just put into freezer.

6. Cookies

I baked chocolate chip cookies and it tasted just yumm :) for christmas I baked gingerbread cookies and oatmeal raisin along with American YES students in Indonesia; Amy Andrew and Nathan. Was a lot of fun :) :) find the recipe online!

7. Grilled cheese sandwich

Obviously one of the easiest lunch choice. I miss grilled cheese with tomato soup! I made some grilled cheese lately. Sooo easy. Just take two slices of bread, smear it with butter. every side. then put a slice of cheddar cheese (or any cheese) in the middle. put in an oven 170 for about 15 minutes.

8. Pretzels :(

So pretzel is officially my favorite snack of all time. The small baked one not the hot pretzel in NYC's side street (well they are also good actually). Haven't found it anywhere, but I just bought Snyder's of Hanover pretzel pieces honey mustard and onion flavor..was so good. Can't recall where to find Auntie Anne's besides Taman Anggrek. Anyone?

Pheww!

Well, yeah, in short, I miss American food :( but well I guess I just have to be more creative to find any way to taste it again! :)

P.S : If anyone ever wonder how big is the portion of food in typical American restaurant, please try Chili's (Sarinah building). Enjoy! :D

bye for now, hope I didn't make you hungry reading this!

Cheers,

Nadia

Magical

On my first day in Vermont, I remember we drove home then we went out again for a walk. Silly me, I thought they were asking me to go for a walk to sightsee the town (that's why I said yes). Yeah, going for a walk means you literally going walking in a place...in this story, a woods near Park-McCullough house. Mom, Zoe, Kati, and I went for a walk with Ivy.

While walking, Zoe kept asking me couple question...well, it's our first day meeting each other! I was concentrating on keeping up my pace with theirs (Did I ever say about how American walk? FAST) but Zoe caught my attention with one question.

"What club do you want to join?"

And almost reflex, I answered "Drama club."

I've never been participated in any kind of play slash performance slash anything on stage except singing.......in a choir. But being in a play, actually doing something on stage and have actual people come to see the play is different. I have no idea how it works; how play are selected, how set is built, how the roles are casted, how the lighting works, the sounds, the props, the costume, I know nothing about them before I decide to join in Drama club. I honestly cannot recall when and where did I get that interest, curiosity and passion about drama and being on stage because nothing I've experienced in my life prior to it has anything influential or somehow significant or even important to that much of passion toward theater arts inside me.

And that thing-I-cannot-recall also led me to the decision to take Theater Arts class for both semester; practically a whole academic year. I had no doubt at all; I did not worry about anything. I didn't think about the how-ifs; I was convinced, I was sure that this class is the right class for me, that I belong to the class. My host mom and my counselor were telling me I could change it after sometimes if it didn't work, but I was a hundred percent sure I won't and this is what I want. It almost felt like.......fate.

First day at the class....it was almost like in sit-com. I sat there, watching all my classmates with all their different personalities which is absolutely fun to watch. For a whole year the class never let me being gloomy or sad for too long; it was just a perfect class to end my day and I brought home some good stories from the class.

Then I was involved in my first play ever, it was a musical The Sound of Music. It was fascinating. I almost cried on the rehearsal day when we actually did it with the orchestra. It was beautiful. The feeling when I saw the house was full...when I walked on stage even just for singing and not saying lines...when the spotlights blinding you from seeing the audiences.....it was magical.

And for the last project in my first semester was writing an original One Act play and I did it. I wrote a play titled No Matter What and had Amber,Seth,Rachelle,and Alexis to be in it. The feeling when the lights came up, and they appeared, saying lines that you wrote, with you watching it, knowing exactly what's coming up, all the unspoken message, the body language, the gesture....the feeling was just indescribable :)

I slowly got more and more lines in the play I was involved in. The Sound of Music, A Midsummer Night's Dream, One Act play, and Arabian Night. Even when I had no lines at all, I still enjoyed my time. I love spending my times building set, hanging out with drama kids, memorizing lines, or even take a good look at the treasure in the costume room :p

I miss it, badly.

cheers :)

nadia

Moving On

it takes courage
it takes strength
it takes true will
and it takes............time.

It's been a long four years since I met you.
I've never been in love before.
Yet, I might. But not the same like what I had with you.

You actually gave me butterflies.

You gave me pink blushes on my cheeks.

You made me secretly smile behind my book.

You made me doodling your name in every little spot in my notes.

You made me giggle like a little girl.

You made me spend more time in front of the mirror making sure my hair looks right.

You made me smile more than anyone ever did.

You made me whisper your name in my prayer.

You made me check my phone every few seconds, hoping for some updates :)

You made me feel so........alive.

Don't forget on how you made me cry.

How you made me shedding tears.

How you made me hate you.

How you made me feel so miserable.

How you trapped me to love you.

How you made me realize, none of those

was ever your fault.

We never had anything really.

We didn't talk. We didn't text. We didn't hang. We did nothing. We had nothing.

If we ever had anything....that probably only exists in my head.

But there is something that I keep from days to days.
From years to years.
Something special that always makes a smile drawn in my face.

I miss you.
I don't miss you everyday. Honestly, not even every weeks.
I admit that when I'm busy I don't remember you.
I don't actually think about you all the time.
I don't actually dream of you every night.
Just from time to time I knoe it's still there.

Yet I know you never think of me either.
Which is fine, since we never had anything, right? :)
We were just friends.
We were just classmates.
We were just acquaintance.

But you're more than that inside my heart.

You were special.

............And you still are :)

I've been trying to remove you.
I don't know why is it so hard.

Is it possible to love you when we're not even close?

It's been a long four years. And in three years, we haven't seen each other.

I have enough. I have waited too long. I've been crying too much. I've been wondering so much things that never gonna happen. I gotta move on.

It's gonna be tough.
It's gonna be hard.
It's gonna be painful.
But I assume, it'll be worth it.

:)

Remember me, will you?

Just a girl. Not even pretty. Not even attractive in any way.

Remember me as a friend of yours, will you?

Who used to love you. Who still has love for you. Who used to doodle your name in her wrist. Who used to whisper your name in her prayer.

"Sekarang aku tersadar,
Cinta yang kutunggu tak kunjung datang
Apalah arti aku menunggu bila kamu tak cinta lagi...."
- Raisa

Last Pieces of My Adventure

So.....just realized that I didn't post anything about what I've done in my last couple months in America. Just thought I'll post some here ;)

Purim Festival. Whipped cream + Twizzlers = WINNING, DUH.

My last play :( Arabian Nights with Heather and Jayde. Love n miss this class xo

Me at Harvard University, Boston. International Club Trip!

Spring Choir Concert :D Holden, Amelia, Alexis, me

Hannah and me. Theater Arts field trip to NYC; watching Broadway show! Yippie

NYC (Again!) PAX Cluster field trip

Mayfest 2011. It was an absolute blast

Senior Prom :D was awesome #nuffsaid

last day, last picture with my best girl Alexis <3

it's a wrap! the end of my amazing year.

cheers,

Nadia

Home

"...I'm going home,

back to the place where I belong

And where your love has always been enough for me..."

Daughtry - Home

Yup guys, I'm home.

Well, the end of my exchange year is kinda different from other kids but it's fine, I got over it. You just can't predict the future, right? ;)

Being back home at first was............weird.
So when I first stepped in Soekarno-Hatta, I sighed and told myself
"Welcome home, Nad. It's time to wake up."

Everything seemed unfamiliar. The crowd. The language. The heat. The smells. Just everything. I was like out of space. I felt like I never knew this place before, yet I knew that isn't true.

I got out the exit door and boom. I saw my friends, a bunch of them, waiting for me with a big smile on their face. They were like "oh my god you're really back!" "nadiaaa!" and I was just stoned, standing there, couldn't even say a thing.

Overwhelmed. That would describe what I felt perfectly. Maybe that's why my first word in Indonesia was "F*ck" (pardon me for that :p)

I met my parents and my brother. I went back home. Everything just weird. I couldn't really speak Indonesian properly (please underline and bold this; PROPERLY. I can talk Indonesian of course, but it was pretty weird for the first few weeks)

Don't get me wrong. Of course I'm excited to be back and meet my friends. Going back to the city I loved after being a country girl for 10 months. I'm excited for the food (American food is infamous with their blend flavour) Indonesian food are so rich in taste! I'm excited to sleep on my own bed, using my own bathroom, and everything.

But it's unavoidable that after living for 10 months in America with completely different life style, I need to readjust back to the life in here. I was so used to my host family lifestyle, which was so different from my own family and that was pretty hard for me to readjust back. It wasn't fun, but I knew it's normal. Every exchange student like me went through the same phase and they survived, why couldn't I. Besides, it's your home. It's my home. Who knows it best besides me? ;)

It's been 3 months since I came back home. I'm now a different person. I'm not the same girl leaving Indonesia last year anymore. I learn a lot. I'm more grateful for everything. I notice little things. I grow up. I'm back in my daily routine, in my original way of living, but with a more opened perspective and fresher mind. Ready to heat up myself more for the world, ready to do more for life, ready to be an agent of change.

Well, it's true that nothing feels quite like home :)

(this is me for returnees talent show at AFS/YES INAYPScNH 011/012 Farewell Party)

Cheers!

Nadia

Overthink

Hi, hello, halo, bonjour.

Gw cuman mau berbagi cerita sedikit disini. "Kasus" yang cukup menarik untuk dibahas, dan buat gue, (lagi-lagi) gue ngerasa di "tes".

Jadi alkisah ada sepasang kakak beradik. Kakaknya perempuan, dan adiknya cowok. Perbedaan umur mereka cuman 2 tahun.Mereka juga punya 2 kakak cowok yang perbedaan umurnya cukup jauh, kurang lebih 14 tahun. Sang kakak kuliah di kota sebelah, dan cuma balik di saat break.

Sejak kecil, si adik ini memang penyakitan. Badannya kurus, dan dia juga punya segala macem alergi dan rentan sama penyakit. Tapi bukan berarti dia ngga banyak gerak, justru dia sangat hiperaktif dan suka loncat sana sini, berceloteh tanpa henti. Karena kondisi badannya yang memang relatif rapuh, sangat wajar kan kalo dia deket banget sama nyokapnya.

Sang nyokap, wanita yang sangat dinamis. Di umurnya yang udah kepala empat, dia masih sibuk sekolah dan kerja segala macem; konsultasi ini dan itu dan sekaligus ngurusin kedua anaknya. Sang ayah, sangat humoris dan sederhana, tapi cowok banget. Tertarik nya sama mesin dan automotif dan segala macem peralatan berat macam itu. Dia deket sama anak-anaknya meskipun ngga sedeket sang ibu.

Kasusnya dimulai disini.
Jadi suatu hari kita main game rame-rame, dan gue dengan bercanda nanya kepada si Adik boleh gak gue make up in mukanya dia dan dia ketawa tawa doang. Dan itu gue bener bener bercanda, dan bahkan gue lupa. Tapi beberapa hari kemudian, dia ngingetin gue tentang make up project itu dan gue terkaget kaget soalnya dia yang "minta". Dan bahkan dia dengan semangat ngeluarin seluruh alat tempur (enggak deng, make up nya punya gue tapi nail polishnya punya nyokapnya) dan kita pun ke bawah.

Awalnya gue bingung kenapa dia semangat banget. Gue agak ragu buat ngelakuin ini, secara si Ayah di rumah dan dia ngeliat si Adik semangat. (Ingat, si Adik cuma 8 tahun). Tapi si Adik super semangat dan bahkan dia make makeup gue sendiri, dan gue gak berdaya dan akhirnya bantuin doi. Nggak lama kemudian, si Ayah turun dan ngeliat si Adik lagi berkuteks ria (dibantu gue).

Dan reaksi si Ayah sih ketebak , dia marah. Nggak ngamuk, cuman dengan nada keras nyuruh itu dihapus. "You're not a girl." Si Adik awalnya nolak, tp si Ayah bilang kalo dia bakal kena masalah kalo 20 menit ke depan dia liat si Adik masih dengan kuku berkuteks. Dan setelah si Ayah pergi, langsung heboh lah gue dengan si adik ngapusin tuh kuteks satu persatu. Si Adik cuma bilang "yah, ayah nggak suka aku begini." dengan nada yang cukup kentara kalau dia....sedih. and it broke my heart.

What's wrong with that?

Okay, maybe I'm becoming a little bit way too liberal here. But when you think about it, seriously, what is wrong with that? He was just having fun. Putting make up on your face is not a sin.

Is putting make up on your face is exclusive for girls only?

Does it make you gay when you're a male and you put some make up on?

If it does, so what?

Well, in the future. If he ever becomes gay, will the dad accept it? will he ever think that it might be a result of his lack of attention to him when he was little? he was so close to his mom.

for the boy. will he ever wander whose fault is this? will he ever look back in the mirror and regret what he has become? or will he ever secretly wish in his heart that if only his dad had a little bit more time for him since he was little and taught him more about boys' stuff he will never be what he is today?

whose fault is it gonna be then? who is to blame?

in my opinion, it's no one fault. being gay is never a fault. it's never their choice to be gay or not to be gay. love is still love no matter who said it or did it. gay is beautiful.

everything is beautiful in their own way.

stop stereotyping campaign is on :)